I deserve better

Life is Weird

I again started to think too much.
Because of a guy that I hang with.
I do not care about people at the very beginning
However when I start to care them, I become insecure
Paranoid, touchy
And emotional.
That is why, relationships are not for me
I care what the other person thinks too much because I have something, someone to lose
I am afraid of being broken and this is what brings me a failure

I have someone to go crazy on

I imagine the two of us and I see the greatest couple 

Oh my 

I have to be accepted.

All I need is love
Love love love
Love is all I need

But for real
He is everything that I've always wanted
God please don't play harsh on me
This has to go well
Do not play harsh on my please

He has everything that I want.
I want him.

I have lots of things to do but procrastination is what I am majoring in.

"Given The Dog A Bone" is metaphorically disgusting but I still love the song.
I love Pleasure Slave by Manowar too.
But the lyrics are, you know how the lyrics are, don't you?

Pişmanlık

Gece gece ne diye onca şey yedim?
Yerken iyi sonrasındaki pişmanlık kötü be dostlar.

Yine hayal alemine dalıyorum.
Hayal kurmak güzel,
Gerçek olmadığını bilmek kötü.
Ne zaman gerçek dünya hayallerimden daha güzel olacak?
Neden hiçbir şey olmuyor?

Sevgilileriniz bana bakıyor,
Ama benim size bakacak bir sevgilim bile yok.

Spoiler of Sons of Anarchy

Oh now Sons of Anarchy is fucking my feelings........AGAIN!
Then Donna and Opie,
Now Tara...
I am speechless.
What is going to happen next?
What is going to happen to Jax and his sons and to the club?
Fuck you Gemma and Juice.
Fuck you Unser for not knowing anything but leading Gemma with your assumptions.You should have known that Gemma is capable of doing everything, even worse when she is high.Stupid man of Gemma's slave.
Fuck Tara's lawyer for calling Unser.
Fuck Jax for not taking precautions against Gemma.
But FUCK GEMMA SHE HAS TO DIE SHE IS A SELSIFH CUNT WHO SEEMS TO CARE EVERYBODY ELSE BUT ONLY THINKS OF HERSELF.
Gemma I hate you you are the biggest bitch.

"What you are, crashing into who you are"

I feel bad for some reasons.
I came to a realise that I have so much potential that I do not use.
I can accomplish things with a little afford but I simply choose the things that do not require any special afford.
I might have different adjectives behind my name right now.
A guitarist
A pianist
A student in Bogazici University
A 'something related with science' student

But I just cannot study and focus.
It kills me not to use my talent and my brain effectively.

Something is wrong up here.

Maybe this is the most common thing to say but we all are the slaves of the system.
How much we hate it, we are in it. We are the ones who keep it running.
We do not want it but we cannot give up the so called opportunities that it provides and this makes us dependent to it.
I hate myself for hating and loving it.

BIG SPOILERS OF PRISON BREAK

WHAT THE FUCK WAS PRISON BREAK'S FINALE? OH YOU SUCKERS I AM SO FUCKING CRYING RIGHT NOW AND GODDAMINGLY PISSED YES I WATCHED THE SHOW 5 YEARS LATER WHO CARES FUCK WHY DID IT HAVE TO BE LIKE THAT FUCK PRISONS FUCK SECURITY CAMERAS FUCK CLOSED DOORS SARA AND MICHAEL COULD LIVE HAPPILY EVER AFTER WITH THEIR CHILD THEIR CHILD IS INNOCENT AND HE DESERVES TO KNOW HIS FATHER OH LINCOLN YOU KNEW THAT HE WAS GOING TO BE AN AWESOME FATHER OHHHHH GOOOOOODDDD WHY DID YOU PUT HER INTO JAIL WHY THE FUCK? WHY THE FUCK THAT WAS NECESSARY? WHY THE FUCK WAS IT? YOU CREATED A CHARACTER LIKE SCOFIELD AND THAT WAS HIS ENDING? OHHHHHH FUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKK MICHAEL COULD HEAL AND THEY COULD LIVE HAPPILY IN PANAMA AS A FUCKING FAMILY I AM SO PISSED RIGHT NOW

WHAT HAPPENED TO SUCRE BY THE WAY? 

FUCK THE GENERAL AND HIS GODZILLA FACE
I'D BETTER GO DIE IN THE CORNER OF MY ROOM
AND HIS GRAVE STONE............. BE THE CHANGE YOU WANT TO SEE IN THE WORLD
BABY THAT QUOTATION WAS THEIR FIRST THING IN COMMON

OH NOW I REMEMBER WHAT HAPPENED TO SUCRE. HE IS LIVING WITH HIS FAMILY I AM GLAD FOR HIM 

Aggressive but calm.
This is how we are.

Admit it,
You need love.

Is there a man like Micheal Scofield in real life?
If there is I am in love with that guy without a doubt.

Bugün elime bir mandalina aldım,
Avucum kadardı, her yeri turuncuydu, kocaman yeşil bir yaprağı vardı
Renkleri birbiriyle o kadar uyumluydu ki
Turuncu ve yeşil
Sonra kendime sordum "Doğada hiç birbiriyle uyumlu olmayan bir şey gördüm mü?" diye
Hayır doğada birbiriyle uyumsuz olan hiçbir şey yok
Her şey bir düzen içinde
Disiplinli bir güzelliği var
Çok mucizevi değil mi?
Doğa çok güzel
Bizi bıraksalar keşke
Betonda boğulmasak

Belki de hayatınızı değiştirecek insanın yanından geçip gittiniz bugün

Siz insanlar hep birlikte kendi karanlığınızda boğulun
Ben ise bir köşeye çekilip kendi yalnızlığımda güneşimi bulacağım
Karanlıktan korkarken nasıl aranıza karışırım?
Belki de gözlerimin alışmasından korkuyorum,
Belki de sizin gibi yabanileşmekten korkuyorum
Belki de sizin hakkınızda düşündüğüm her şey aslında kendimde gördüklerimdir
Belki yorulmaktan korkuyorum
Sustum
Çünkü söyleyemedim
Hepsini anlatamadım
Yine içimde kaldı
Yine hepsini anlatamadığımdan içimde fırtınalar koptu
Hey beni dinliyor musunuz?
Tabularınızı alın gidin, ben bir köşeye sakladım onları
Halının altına
Bir gün olur da aniden dışarı çıkarlarsa eğer
Beni nerede bulacağınızı biliyorsunuz ey aklı başındalar
O bahçede sizden uzak olacak ama hayallerimde siz olacaksınız
Gerçeklerim zamanında hayallerimden daha güzel olmuş olacak sonra benden alınmış olacak
Ya da hiçbir zaman güzel olmamış olacak, artık kendi ütopyamda kuracağım yuvamı
Ben daha çok gencim.

I've been waiting for so long for something to happen good.
This is wrong.

A Beautiful Wish

I want to play Beethoven's Moonlight Sonata on the piano someday...
I really do.

"Excuse my French but I'd let him fuck me so hard."

"Maybe now you are saying "Oh look at what she's saying...She doesn't know anything about drugs but jusy talking nonsense. Okay that is your perspective but I know what I am talking about and always will say no to them. Maybe you are also saying that "This is what nature is giving to us, why do we turn it down?".I am a hundred percent agree with you, use them if they are beneficial to you and this gift of nature is not good for us. So my fellas that was my presentation."

I guess I am in love with Micheal Scofield

I don't really give a shit about you, would you please shut the fuck up for a moment?
You could be a good friend but that isn't your approach, you are not even my type so fuck off just a little bit.

Drugs are like being alone in a dark room.

The day Metallica's and Megadeth's members die, I will feel that I am really old and the things that I care started to fade away.

I don't know how I am going to deal with Dave's and James's deaths. They don't know me as a person but it does not matter. I really love them and respect them.Their music keeps me sane.